The worst part about going to Topataco is there are so many hilarious things on that site. You can get Rogues of Wool totes, or Cat Lady Pride! ones. They have bumper stickers that say "I was an honor roll student. I don't know what happened." And of course they have all of the Sheldon merchandise, in case you need to get your SQUEE! on.
(Note that you should order Topataco things by Nov 22 if you want a prayer of getting it by Christmas.)
Also, while I don't want this, I do think it's hilarious (and also from Wondermark):
Translation: "My parents never taught me Arabic."